He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
