well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
