So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize