Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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