Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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