I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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