you will always have a special place in my vag
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
