STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize