brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
