They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
theres a video...