Soap is not a condiment
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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