He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
