what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
