im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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