GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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