Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
