I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
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