Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
bring money and cleavage
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
