Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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