i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize