He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
My vagina is officially offended.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
