Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
