She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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