Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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