Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
