I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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