He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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