just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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