Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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