tell your sister to shave her snatch
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize