He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
