Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
You need a sexual gate keeper
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize