I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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