i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
