idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
