So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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