smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
