They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize