You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
