I can tuck mytits in my pants
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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