every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Of course I have a pirate flag
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize