so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize