Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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