She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
