Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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