it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
