we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize