Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Randomize
