Having a random hookup so left but love u
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize