I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
It's shark week go big or go home
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
