Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
